The Christmas cracker is a cardboard tube, tied shut at both ends. When two people pull it apart, an inner ‘snapper’ gives off a bang while the cracker’s contents fall into your mashed potatoes and gravy. There’s usually a paper hat that tears the moment you try to fit it on your head (or falls away with the after-dinner meat sweats), a gift that tends to be something like a magic trick, a miniature sewing kit or a golf tee, along with a joke, like this one:
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
Cracker jokes are notorious for being awful.
Because of this, I have created the Crackerjoke-a-tron. It’s the ultimate joke response unit that allows you to pronounce judgement upon the jokes at this year’s Christmas table.
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